Should I call you that?
I tell myself I should
because what I’ve fallen for
is an image of you in my head;
an image of you I have created;
I have nurtured,
shamelessly, with love.
That is why I fear to tell you
I love you.
because I fear, at what might happen,
and it’s not just about you saying
that you’ll never understand this.
It’s about discovering parts of you
I haven’t yet imagined.
I haven’t yet feared.
It’s about discovering our differences that from a distance seem so trivial.
It’s about discovering you
don’t want to be loved by a woman.
It’s about discovering that our walls
are built too strong to break.
It’s about discovering that my love
for you is just a game I play.
That there is more to you
than I can ever imagine,
that you have dreams too that you chase,
love that you crave.
And in that moment all I can offer you
is my friendship,
but from a distance.
Because I’m too embarrassed to break
in front of your